dicembre

december

where did the year go? i look back and cant believe that 11 months have passed so quickly. so much has changed in my life, from my hopes and dreams to my reality.
a year ago i was planning on going to iwp, with some reservations, but hopeful because of the program i was going to be a part of. two months later i withdrew and was at a loss, not knowing what to do with myself. then i attended a graduate student day at au and was once again hopeful. i met some interesting people and the program seemed like it could work. so i had my school, but nothing to do because school didnt start for five more months. so, i started at gap, and that was that. easy money, though at times i still want to rip my hair out. i applied for internship after internship, and finally got one that starts in january. well, if i pass my background check that is. then school began and i heaved a huge sigh of relief as everything seemed to be clicking- classes, friends, and internships. i was accepted for another internship starting in the summer and going through the following fall, so it seemed like my life was set. then, this second internship kind of fell apart and i am once again feeling at a loss and unsure of what i am going to do. i had hoped that this second internship could lead to a job eventually, but now i think that is not an option, so i am wondering once again about the direction i want to take with my life and where i eventually want to work. essentially, a year has passed and while a lot has changed, it still feels like there has not been a lot of change as well, sigh.
i hope that a year from now i am a bit more settled in my hopes, dreams, and realities, and looking forward to the following year.

dicembre