Decisions decisions...

So I have been to DC and back, and the trip was supposed to make all my decisions easier. Instead, I have more questions than answers. I went to the Institute of World Politics, and I met an admissions adviser, as well as the president of the university. The courses all look really interesting, but I am worried that the courses are more geared towards strategy and policy, and I am more interested in analysis. I am someone who likes to be in the background, and this school prepares you to be in the foreground. It isn't necessarily a bad thing to be able to be in the front while residing in the back, but I am worried that it will be too much stress for something I really don't want to do. Also, the school is so tiny, and not really well known. Part of the reason I want to go to grad school is to get a leg up in the industry and make connections. Going to a place that no one knows abut may not necessarily help me. Then there is that final. I know I shouldn't base whether or not I go to a school on the final exam, but it is still scary.
Then there is American. It is a great school, but is it really where I want to go? It is ranked in the top 3 of its kind of school, but do I want to go there only for the name? I am afraid that A) it will be a continuation of what I have already done, and B) that it has nothing to do with what I really want to do.
So, what do I want to do? I want to work in the intelligence industry. I do not want to be the one gathering the intelligence, I want to be the one who gets it, looks at it, and analyzes it. I have no desire to be a star, but I want to have an impact. I want to make a difference, as cliche as it sounds.
Sigh. So as seen, I have all of these questions and no answers... and I am not done yet.
I found a program at Georgetown University that seems geared exactly towards what I want to do. But, can I get into Georgetown? I really have my reservations. My GRE scores are no where near their average. Then again, it is only an average, and I have other good points. The school has the name, and the program, everything really... but is it an impossible dream?
Sigh, decisions, decisions...

One Night of Stars

Well, I have decided once again to try a journal. I am too impatient to write in an actual journal, so having my own space in the vastness of the internet seems to be the next best thing.

I chose the name "one night of stars" because I often stare up at the stars wishing and hoping. Therefore, it seems to make sense that my title be something somewhat romantic.

I am officially a graduate now of UCSB. I will never again call Isla Vista home. It is kind of sad, but exciting and scary at the same time. I am excited to be moving beyond that stage in my life, but sad that so many friendships will be dying. Then again, were they really friendships if moving across the country ended them so easily? Who knows. I find myself looking back on the past four years with mixed feelings. I wish I could say that it was all happy, but there were too many moments of sadness and frustration in there for that to be true. I can say though, that it was a learning experience, and that I would not change very much of what happened because there was so much good. All in all, college was more than I expected it to be, and therefore so much better than it could have been.

Looking forward though, I come to more questions than answers. I know that I will be going to Washington, DC for graduate school, but I do not know which school I will be attending, what masters degree I will be getting, where I will be living, who I will be living with, etc. I am excited though to be continuing my education. I know to some it seems like more school? But I can honestly say that I enjoy learning, especially when I know that it actually pertains to the world around us, and I do feel that my studies will fulfill this. Overall, I am truly excited, though a little scared as well. Then again, I suppose that is to be expected.

The one area in life in which I feel like I am lacking is the love life. This is because I don't have one. I don't know if it is me or just the guys I come into contact with. It is something I am going to try not to worry too much about though, because otherwise I will just become depressed. Sigh.

I suppose that is enough for now. So here is to a new journal and new journey's in the future.